Self Help from FMD
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I received some excellent although obvious advice from a friend stating “If you stop making bad decisions eventually your karma will improve.” Well, I have. I have been making preparations for a better life since the day I moved in to his home. By avoiding the people who influenced me to make horrible decisions I have made several strides in the right direction and have begun preparing for my next step. Unfortunately some of the things I have to do to repair my karma involves being around some pretty dangerous characters. I have found that even the dangerous characters I mentioned think it’s a good thing that I am repairing my horrible name one step at a time. I have turned down more “bad” activities in the past year than I have ever been invited to partake in. Slowly but surely I am improving and becoming an actual human being. I do run into snags now and then like getting arrested or having my ex wives debt garnish the majority of my paycheck but I remember the lessons that stick with me that I learned from an actual Jew….Here is an example of some of the uplifting things he sends me. He seems to know when things just aint right……
1. The first key to being mentally tough is refusing to be a victim and accepting 100% responsibility for your actions. It is not your parents' fault, your boss's fault, the fault of the government or someone you knew when you were a teenager. How in the world can you be mentally tough when you blame others for your lot in life? It is empowering to accept responsibility for your fate.
When you consciously or subconsciously blame another (government, economy, family, etc.) for the outcome of your life, you are significantly reducing the chances of a happy life. This is true because you have given someone else the power to control your thoughts and actions.
2. Next, become mentally tough by becoming physically tough. Yes, there is a confidence that you will have when your muscles are toned and a walk on the beach does not exhaust you. Now, when I am 85 years old, do I expect to bench 225 pounds and run 4 miles a day? Absolutely not! However, I do expect myself to put forth the maximum effort all the time so when I am 35, 45, 55 or 85 I am in the best possible shape for a 35-, 45-, 55- or 85-year-old.
The confidence that comes from being fit is one that can't be found anywhere else. Watch what you eat and exercise. It is crucial in being mentally tough.
3. Set goals and then accomplish them! How many times do people make New Years resolutions only to break them by January 20th? This is a much bigger deal than you may think. It is a big deal because subconsciously you are telling your mind, "I can't even keep a New Years resolution!" When you tell yourself this subconsciously, you then begin to lose confidence in yourself and every aspect of your life is affected. When someone compliments you – it makes you feel awkward because deep down you think, "Gee, if they only knew that I can't even keep a New Years resolution."
Do as I am doing and actually take in this information and maybe you wont find humor in some of the sick things I write. I have hope for you all yet.
[note from editor Abe: the above text about mental toughness was actually an email that circulated which was written by Ron White]
Good advice
I tell you what, this is good advice. I read it, then read it again, and alot of people, including myself, would be so further ahead in life by doing exactly what you/Abe are suggesting. I especially like the part about refusing to be a victim, its a tough thing to do, but makes total sense. Good job and good luck. As far as the ex's go just be thankful, as I am, that all the new problems they propagate are someones elses sh#t sandwhich to eat. Good post!
RE. Good advice
Big Daddy,
Not playing the victim is hard when you endure the serious hardships that life throws at you. Its difficult to get into a forward thinking thought pattern when actual hardships arent your fault. All you can do is hope that you can muster the intestinal fortitude to push through whatever life throws at you you. I've lost quite a bit in my life and I know others who have lost as well...But if we keep in mind that we arent going to let life beat us before our time...We wont let any hardship regardless of the severity derail us from the path we are on...Bad things happen to good people, god works in mysterious ways, and it was meant to be are all excuses to help us play the victim...Look out for these as they will certainly lead to a calous and hardned view on life. Its ok to feel and its ok to hurt...but it is not ok to internalize and throw in the towel. I personally am ready for round 2! "I didnt hear no bell!"