Metro-Sexual

Metro-Sexual - The new gay. When did society deem it appropriate for men to wear pink? “But FMD, I wear pink because I am secure in my sexuality.” NO, you wear pink because you secretly want to be entered by another colon camper. You as a boy would have never worn pink in a million years, yet as an adult you seem more comfortable to violate the laws of nature and plug in to another man. “But FMD, chicks dig metro’s” That is just an excuse to blow another man. In fact some chicks do prefer metros to real men…and this is why.. The women who seek out “The New Gays” are looking to keep the pleasure of the skin flute visiting their guts but at the same time want to have the comfort of hanging with their girlfriends. Obviously, all lesbians can do is fuzzy bump and taco dive to give pleasure…They don’t pack the equipment. So in response to this dilemma the government spent millions in lab costs to create The Metro. The formula to create such an enigma is as follows…10 pints of semen to act as blood, 5 cups estrogen, extract all testosterone, add a little hair gel, throw on a pink shirt and an Express credit card and BAM!!!! You got yourself a Metro. Now ladies, I know this seems like a difficult mix to make in the comfort of your own home…but your only other option is to take your most feminine friend and pay for an addadictome (procedure performed on butch women to increase their phallic presence).